Done

it has been a while.
not that i don't wnat to write anything here. But i have the feeling of distinguish the writtings between personal matters and what i want people to know. i was hoping that i don't write much. afraid of letting my inner freedom being seen by so many eyes.

i guess i am being too pampered with my boss. and it turns out me becoming more not productive. or is it actually the environment surrounding me that give the unproductive energy towards every one else. so many people were asking me the questions on what happened here as my division is the one involved with the so-called havoc. i can't share with people over here, as to respect the terms & conditions of being the employee. most of them saying that i am saying negatively, but i have the ground of saying those things.

so what would i share with my fellow friends here.. remember, few years back i was discussing about the economy situation in Malaysia and predicted that the inflation is going to strike in malaysia soon, and the petrol price is going to go down when it was high. i(now i have the guilty feeling of not sharing what i know the most with my friends). i am not saying that i know it is going to be, not saying that i am dam* good with the figures and facts of economic statistic. to be honestly, i have the feeling of loosing the idea and picture of those numbers. but from the condition i have now, something is reallly really not right with Malaysia.. (if i am going to say what i want to say, will i be arrested? well u know that bloggers are being monitored by the government isn't it? )

i see the ideas, of which it is good. but i also have the feeling, implementation is not as good as on the paper. when things are not going smoothly, then there is something wrong with the current state of economy and the management of the country. continuanity of this will resulting in Malaysia becoming like Indonesia's state of economy. i have to gather all the facts before present the opinions. i guess most of the readers are already aware the possibility that we are going to be a stranger in our own land. Macam melukut di tepi gantang, menang bersorak kampung tergadai...

it hurts so much. so much to think about my own people, about my own land that more and more of them are becoming not Malays.. and indirectly not practising themselves as a muslim. i was thinking about the batlle of hundreds of years to fight for our own rights; thinking that all the people who were killed and died to protect our belief that God is One, to protect the land, the people, and the life of the next generations..

mungkin saya tidak pernah mengkaji secara mendalam tentang sejarah negara saya sendiri. mungkin saya hanya tahu sedikit sahaja. walau saya bercakap dan menulis dalam bahasa lain, tapi saya kira saya lebih mahir di dalam bahasa sendiri... menulis di dalam bahasa lain, supaya ilmu tidak hilang begitu sahaja kerana saya adalah insan yang tidak kuat ingatannya.

kadang2 terfikir, kesiannya kepada adik2 sekarang. belajar sudahlah sangat susah; kemudian sains dan matematik ditukar-ajar ke bahasa inggeris. sometimes i was thinking what is the point of doing that? untuk mudah dapat kerja nanti? untuk jadikan lebih berdaya saing? untuk lebih banyak mengkaji ilmu2 itu di dalam bahasa lain? kenapalah nak dibebankan budak2 itu saya rasa. kalau tujuannya supaya mereka dapat mengkaji ilmu2 sains dan matematik dgn baik, tukar ajeler silibus dan pendekatan pengajaran supaya lebih menjurus ke arah itu. kalau nak katakan untuk kerja dan lebih berdaya saing, kenapa tak wajibkan sahaja semua pengajaran di IPT Malaysia di buat dalam bahasa inggeris? saya sendiri pun sekolah dulu belajar bahasa melayu. alHamdulillah boleh dikatakan agak berjaya juga sekarang. saya kira ramai sudah graduan2 yang berjaya dan hebat2 yang dulu di sekolahnnya memang sekolah yang bahasanya bahasa kebangsaan. apalahh masalahnya dengan negara sendiri, bila niat seorang diri hancurkan seluruh masa depan negara. terlupa agaknya setiap seorang dari rakyat akan datang menuntut hak mereka di akhirat nanti.

p/s: peringatan untuk diri sendiri:
panjang pulak kali ini. sudahlah tu, awak tu pun entah ke mana hala tujuan. macam bagus sahaja tulis gitu dan gini. pulang sahajalah, marilah pulang sebelum bertambah kelam...